While this is quite dated and not very funny, it is of historical importance to the film and worth examining. Anyone could just scan the magazine, so I will go farther by providing details and notes.
Notes | Pictures
More than anything this shows the power of the film back then that a parody was released as the cover story a full YEAR and a half after the film was released.
First Published: Issue 159 - June 73 (33230)
Price: 40¢ cheap
Cover Art: Norman Mingo - Alfred E. Neuman as Alex, cutting open an orange with a knife and clockwork gears popping out.
Cover text: In this issue we peel the pretense off A Crockwork Lemon
Character names - Alecch DeLugg, Gouger, Dimwit, Bilgey Boy, P, M, Dr. Brainem, Dr. Broadski, Julienne
Pg. 1: Vital Features: A Crockwork Lemon (Movie Satire) Pg. 4
Pg. 4: Text - De Sadest Story Ever Told Dept - Us moral people all hate violence, right? Let's hear it for "Anti-Violence"! Yayyy! Stanley Kubrick also hates violence, right? Let's hear it for Stanley Kubrick! Yayyy! And let's hear it for his new movie, which shows how horrible violence is! Yay - uh - Hey, wait a minute! If Mr. Kubrick's new movie is so "Anti-Violence," how come it's jam-packed with the worst, sickening, most disgusting violence imaginable? Let's face it, Stanley, baby! Your movie is really...A Crockwork Lemon
Pg. 4: Visual Jokes - instead of eyeball cufflinks, Alex has oranges. The poster image shows one exploding with clockwork gear coming out. Pete carries a mace, instead of codpieces they wear Pampers diapers. There is a hobo mouse next to the tramp and Georgie has eyes on his breasts.
Pg. 4: Notes - The first text joke calls the make up man a faggot. This shows how dated it is as that has been considered an offensive term by most for many years.
Pg. 5: Artist: George Woodbridge, Writer: Stan Hart
Pg. 5: Visual Jokes - Georgie uses an anvil and Dim uses a sink to beat the tramp. A mouse offers 'National Health and Accident Plan' insurance to the tramp. The action effects are written in a Korova style font. The margin gag shows kids pelting cars from a school bus.
Pg. 6: Visual Jokes - Home is titled 'Homey', Georgie has a funny nose and glasses instead of a mask. The margin gag has frogs lining up for a princess to kiss them (a play on the Frog Prince fairy tale).
Pg. 6: Notes - Pete is nowhere to be found. Alex's mom comes in while he's listening to music, in the film she comes to him the next day and doesn't enter the room.
Pg. 7: Visual Jokes - The nose on Alex's mask droops and goes back up, Alex's uses an elephant head instead of a phallus to hit the Cat Lady. The margin gag has a man building a ladder and lining up the pieces wrong.
Pg. 7: Notes - Pete lost his mace and the Cat Lady shows Alex her safe which wasn't in the film.
Pg. 8: Visual Jokes - The license plate on the police car is M2GW probably a reference to the artist's initials, Georgie's suspender straps have a heart on the back, the warden's desk has barbed wire around it plus a whip and mini guillotine on it, during the Ludovico technique Alex is fed popcorn and shown footage from a New York High School and Dean Martin getting a drink. The margin gag has a cavegirl saying the lump on her head is from a branch falling on her instead of her boyfriend.
Pg. 8: Notes - Georgie hits Alex with the milk bottle instead of Dim.
Pg. 9: Visual Jokes - Alex's is forced to watch 'Love Story' ironically featuring Ryan O'Neal who would star in Kubrick's next film Barry Lyndon in 1975. Alex's has a monogrammed handkerchief, Alex's parents have buttons with 'P' and 'M' on it, M has a liquor bottle next to her. The margin gag has a big guy pulling a man's tooth out by tying it to a doorknob, put pulls all his teeth out at once.
Pg. 9: Notes - There's a big scene in Dr. Brodski's office which was never shown in the film. Alex wants to take a bottle to Joe instead of his fist.
Pg. 10: Visual Jokes - Dim and Georgie are backed up by a Green Beret, there is a sign on the underpass that reads 'Burgess Mews SW-1' and Mrs. Alexander's chair is still around with a padlock marked 'Her chair'. The margin gag has a man leaving a thrift store after changing out of his prison uniform into a suit.
Pg. 11: Visual Jokes - The minister spills a bunch of soup on Alex. At the end Barf Bags are $1, but no one is using them. The margin gag has a drunk guy going past barstools and spinning the people around when he passes making them sick.
Pg. 11: Notes - Alex didn't have soup in the hospital scene and the minister uses a fork in it, so it wouldn't work anyway. In the last panel the guy with a beard looks a lot like Sylvester Stallone, except he wasn't famous yet.
Notes © 1998-10 by Alex D. Thrawn for www.MalcolmMcDowell.net